I'M SO PROUD


Sometime back in October, I had a simple yet memorable experience. While walking to my classroom during the lunch period, I passed one of my students who was walking with two of his friends. Let me preface this by saying that this young man is a little rough around the edges. And if you caught that, then you will understand me when I say that his friends are more than tattered. These are the kids that you see hanging out on the corner. The ones who little old ladies clutch their purses and cross the street for. Well on this day, when I greeted the young men, my student (I’ll call him Kevin) asked me “Where do you see me in five years?” I responded with, “I actually see you graduating from college.” Both he and his friends appeared shocked that I’d responded that way.

Kevin asked, “Really?”

“Absolutely!” I reassured him. “Your grades are excellent and you don’t get caught up in the nonsense of your peers. You are focused and goal-oriented. Those are key skills needed to be successful in college. Do you want to go to college?”

“I hadn’t thought much about it, but yeah.”

Meanwhile, his friends are observing this exchange in amazement that I said something positive about their friend. These students live in an extremely dangerous neighborhood where college isn’t always a feasible option. They see fast money and comradery with their friends or family that come in the form of gang affiliation. This optimism with no sign of doubt was new to them. I was glad that they could be there to hear that not every teacher in the school counted them out.

Fast-forward to November. Kevin asked me to help with his personal statement. I was elated and told him of course I would. Even though he hasn’t shown much initiative since asking me, I’m glad that I made myself available. He still has time to work on it. Every so often, I ask him how he’s doing and he tells me that he hasn’t begun, but he will.

Now that brings me to today. Our school had an assembly to present awards to the students who earned high marks in all of their classes. Kevin was one of those students. The recipients were asked to sit in the front of the auditorium so that they could easily pick up their awards. I was stationed near his friends further back in the room. When his name was called he proudly went up to receive his recognition for his hard work. I was so proud of him, even if he went to the stage with his hood on his head (dress code no-no.) Moments later, one of his friend’s name was called and he ignored it. His name was called a second time and I made eye contact with him and motioned him to go up with a smile. He shook his head. What blew my mind was that his friends were trying to push him up to go to the stage. He refused. They wanted to celebrate him too, but he was more concerned with not looking cool (or maybe he was being shy, but based on my observations of him shy is not a word that I would associate with him). This made me even more proud of Kevin because he was strong enough and disciplined enough and independent enough to step away from his friends to be recognized and demonstrate his pride in his academic excellence.

The moral of the story is, as educators, our words are so powerful. The young minds in front of us are so impressionable. Many times, we are the only ones who speak positivity to them. They hear negativity at home, in the streets, on the news, and from other faculty members. It doesn’t take much effort to be positive and kind. Our words today shape the individuals who will contribute to our society tomorrow. 

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